What to do when you don’t know what to do

Some years ago I hadn’t a steady job, I was in really difficult times and nothing seemed to be working. Everything seemed to be at a standstill. To put simply, I was stuck in a rut. I tried many things but none worked; I couldn’t get the kind of job I wanted, I started two businesses that failed at infancy, I borrowed money that became a bad debt, then I wrote a guide-book on my city (a traveller’s guide) to make some quick money, everything seemed to be going well until on the eve of the book lunch when the government agency I was collaborating with pulled out of the lunching and even went on to stop the event.

I became confused, I seemed to have hit a brick wall, and I didn’t know what else to do. But in the midst of it all I took certain steps that helped me turn my circumstances around including getting a new job, writing my second book, You Are Too Gifted to be Poor that has been featured in several blogs and national newspapers including The Guardian, The Sun News, The Nation, and on some radio and television stations.

If you are going through an impasse, taking the following steps could help you regain control of your life and improve your circumstances.

1. Accept Responsibility for your Life: The first step to creating any meaningful change is to accept responsibility. You must accept that you are responsible for whatever you become now and in the future. Quit passing the buck, it is in the nature of humans to make excuses and pass the blame on others whenever things don’t go right. Someone may be responsible for your past or present predicament, which is only a temporary setback, ultimately you are responsible for your destiny.


2. Pray: Before you raise an eyebrow remember that every religion has its own way of praying, so regardless of your religion, you can always go to your maker in prayer and ask for whatever you desire. That said, one of the most reassuring things you can do in a time of confusion and impasse is to pray. Prayer calms your nerves and gives you hope. It lifts the weight of the burden off you. But even more important, in the place of prayer you can receive fresh inspiration and insight about the situation.


3. Go Back to Your Map: If at any point in the cause of a journey you miss your way, the most rational thing to do would be to go back to your road map and determine your position on the map. So if you are not sure which direction you are headed in your success journey, or if you are confused about which direction to turn next, remember that you are on a journey, and you need a personal road map you can always refer to. A road map shows you your destination and the routes that lead there. In this case, you road map is your purpose – and the goals you have set to guide you through the journey. Your purpose is a compass pointing in the direction of your destiny.


4. Make a Move: One of the fastest ways I know to changing one’s life is to take action. Actions trigger reactions. Never get to a point in your life where you let circumstances stop you from acting on what you believe. If you can’t fly run…if you can’t run walk…if you can’t walk crawl, but in any case do something to keep moving yourself forward. Actions have consequences; when you take action reactions are inevitable. If you never do something no one will ever celebrate you. To every action there is an equal and corresponding reaction. You will never experience certain reactions from people until you have initiated certain actions. Sometimes we just want things to happen, but things don’t happen in a vacuum. Your actions are the seeds that will produce the results you desire. Don’t let fear immobilize you. There’s a Tibetan saying that says, “It is better to have lived one day as a tiger than a thousand years as a sheep.” Make massive moves today.


5. Talk to Someone: All successful people have mentors, coaches, or someone they are accountable to. If you want to be successful you need to have someone you can talk to and confide in regularly; someone you trust and respect; someone you know can look you in the eye and tell you the truth in love; someone you can pour out your soul to and trust them to help you through the dark times; these are the people you count on to nudge, push and spur you into taking action especially in times of impasse.

Do you have any other suggestions that people going through an impasse can heed to experience a change in their circumstances? Kindly let me know in the comment section.

Hilton Etakoh is the author of You Are Too Gifted to be Poor. He covers career, creativity, entrepreneurship, and personal growth. Twitter: @HiltonEtakoh, Facebook: @Hilton Etakoh, website: http://hiltonetakoh.com/

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